It’s been a while hasn’t it.
Lot’s has been going on and I have lot’s to tell you.
I’ve missed my Blog and I’ve missed all my Blogger friends.
I shall be catching up with you all and looking forward to reading what you have all been up to 
x
I’ve been hiding again.
From the guilt of not being perfect.
I know I’m my own worst enemy for it.
Judging myself against an possibly impossible standard.
But I can’t help it.
For I truly fear others looking down and thinking what a complete failure I am.
When in truth no one gives a crap about what I have and haven’t done.
It’s me.
I feel that I’m a failure, and I long to hold my head up high and declare to the world that I am worth something of value.
So instead of holding my head up I have been burying it away – especially from my Blog which is my conscience staring back at me.
There’s so much to do.
Must overcome this paralysis
Janathon is put on hold again today after I crashed the car into a parked whilst reversing out of my drive to go to the gym.
What a twit I am…
Luckely the neighbours were really nice about it all which makes me feel even worse!
Tomorrow is another day…
Cant believe I’ve hit day 10 of this Janathon.
Day 1 – 3 I think were the most challenging with not having done anything for 3 months and gorges myself over Christmas, my body was some what stiff and fat. I had definitely gone backwards.
Then around day 6/7 I started to notice a difference, I could stretch further without feeling as if my body was about to split into 2, and today my stomach feels slightly smaller and I’m no longer bloated.
I’m planning to complete Janathon with the hope I’ll get back to being able to run 5k in 30 mins ish and with bonuses of being able to run further than 5 k and having lost some weight.
Result:
2.5k run 15mins 20 secs
It’s been a while since I’ve blogged about anything much since Janathon”s take over, so I thought I’d blog about the 2 people who have influenced me most in the past few years: my 2 daughters.
I was always more of a Tom boy growing up than a girly princess, preferring time spent on bike exploring rather than dressing up or playing with dolls.
So when I first became pregnant the idea if having a daughter filled me with dread, What would I do with one ? I just couldn’t imagine how I would bond or spend time with girl and was convinced I was having a boy.
Fast forward to the Midwife announcing that a Baby Girl had been born I was shocked, speechless and my heart full of love.
I fell in love with baby girl straight away and I was addicted to her. I couldn’t take my eyes off her and couldn’t stop fussing over her. She was all mine and I was amazed that I could have ever have produced something so beautiful and perfect.
My daughter had arrived and was soon to change my life – for the better.
She has taught me so much about patience, perseverance, responsibility and what love truly is.
2 years later I was blessed again with a second daughter who has made me an even stronger person and I am so glad my children will always have each other in life.
I often wonder what life has in store for my daughters, and whenever I do day dream about their future it’s always one full of happiness and about them taking over the World and changing it for the better of Human kind.
